There is a very special moment each year. It is the first time when I sit somewhere, alone. It is warm enough to be in a t-shirt. I close my eyes and let the sun shine through my face, directly into my head. The first sun-induced drops of sweat appear on my forehead. The winter is over.
Dear kids.
Competence is completely overrated. We tell us that our behaviour and achievements are based on competence, but mostly they are not.
Competence enables you to do your job, not get fired and maybe get a bonus. Competence is strongly related to experience, another overrated trade.
Confidence enables you to do great work: inspire people, move things forward, step out of line, go the extra mile, go through uncomfortable time and space, fail, go on and grow.
Confidence can be learned as a behavioural pattern, independent of what you know or how much experience you have. Once learned, it runs on autopilot and you get constant tiny success experiences. It boosts your dating, your career, and your life journey as a whole. Life is just more fun with more confidence.
There are coaches and workshops out there teaching confidence. You can hardly find anything better to invest your money into!
In an episode of the office, when Michael founds his own paper company, he gets out of a cab to close a deal and the cab driver says: “Confidence: the bread of the wise man and the liquor of the fool.” I have never heard it put more succinct.
Confidence is a tool. Like all tools, you can use it constructively or destructively. Carelessness can lead to severe damage of yourself and others.
Confidence is a muscle. You can train it.
dearkids